Macaroni Mom Confessions: I Never Wanted To Drive a Mini-Van

"Hi everyone. My name is Jennifer.  And I...drive a mini-van."

Even in my wildest dreams these are words that I never dared to utter, let alone consider. So how did it come to this? Well, my friends, buckle up because the decision to not drive a mini-van has some deep-seated roots.

Once I finished college, moving from Indiana to New York for my career in the apparel industry was supposed to make me "cool" by default. And for some time, it seemed to work. Fast-forward eight "cool" years later: I am happily married, living in Bergen County, and taking time off from work to raise my two little boys. Life up to this point has been more fulfilling then I dreamed. But just a few weeks ago, my husband and I decided it was time to get a new car.

With our annual 1,200 mile round trip trek to Indiana looming and our 2004 Jeep Cherokee "Grey Bird" going on 10 years in the family, it was clear that our once trusty stead was starting to see better days. The growing realization that our boys (and their toys) would soon be bursting at the seams of "Grey Bird's" capacity pushed us to search for a more long-term family car.

We determined that, besides fitting within our budget, the most important features we need in a car are fuel efficiencey and seven-passenger seating. We knew we were ready to purchase rather than lease, eliminating any new models and sedans, and opening the door for certified pre-owned cross-overs & SUV's...but no vans.

I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with vans, nor do I have anyone to impress. But as I looked at my life, I never (ever) saw driving a mini-van in my cards. It didn't matter that our family's long-term goal of having a spacious, fuel-efficient, affordable family car logically points to a mini-van. What did matter was, as a new stay at home mom who halted her career to raise a family, I never had any desire for one. I felt that I had already compromised so much of myself by stepping back from my career. I feared the perception of driving a min-van would seal my fate that the corporate world might never look at me the same again. Or better yet, that I would never look at it the same and that was something I was not prepared for.

As we began the car search, I advocated first and foremost for my personal favorite: the Nissan Pathfinder. Since moving out East it had been my dream to own one once I had established my career. It seemed crystal clear to me that now is the time. With it's upscale appearance and rugged durability - even it's name seemed to fit my life at the time. There was a 'cool' factor about it that seemed unreachable for any other vehicle of its kind. I was ready for our adventure to finally begin!

At the Ramsey/Nissan dealership, my excitement quickly dampened. I saw my dream quietly vanish as we restrained our 3 year old and entertained our 6 month old while trying to have an adult conversation with a salesman comparing Rogues to Pathfinders. It was clear from a mix of hand gestures and key phrases that most pre-owned Pathfinders within our budget were just too bulky and not fuel efficient enough for what we had in mind. I was heartbroken inside. If a Pathfinder was not for us, then what was? Suddenly our car search turned into a soul search and my mind was racing. Just as my dreams and my reality were crashing straight into each other, my husband sweetly reminded me that it was just not for us now, not never.

With this in mind we forged ahead and left the dealership certain of two things :

1. Although a Pathfinder may have be for us someday, it was not for us now.

2. Next visit to a dealership -- kids stay at home with a sitter.

Part 3 of "I Never Wanted to Drive a Mini-Van"